A Picture
Last one. Bet you're pretty sick of all these posts now. LOL. Well this one is pretty vague. A picture. So I guess it's up to me what kind of picture I want to post. So...
3 Wishes
Just 3 wishes? Can't I have 5 or 10? No, alright I guess I'll stick to 3 then.
I wish for a new job. One where I enjoy what I do, I have co-workers who appreciate what I do and don't stab me in the back. One where I get paid an appropriate amount for what I do, where I can make enough money to support myself and my pony comfortably without having to work a second job. Mainly I just want a job where I don't make myself sick everyday I go into the office.
I wish to meet someone. I'm almost *gasp* *shudder* 29 *eek!* And I'm ready to settle down and meet someone. I want to have someone to share my life with. Someone to come home and complain about my day to. Someone to listen to as he complains about his day. I want to have someone that takes care of me. I want someone to share my love for my pony with. I just want someone to be there for me, no matter what. I want to have a family.
I wish I had more confidence. I wish I had the confidence to achieve my potential when riding. I wish I had the confidence to go out and get what I want in life. I wish I had more confidence to take chances with my life instead of doing what's safe.
And I know this was probably meant to be an uplifting post. Oh what do you wish for, kind of thing. Really though it's kinda depressing for me. All these things I wish I could have and yet it probably won't happen for me. Ok, time to go eat ice cream.
Something That Stresses Me Out
Well if you've been following this blog for anytime at all you know that the big thing that stresses me out is my job. I'm overworked and underpaid (of course, who isn't?) I really am to the point that I'm ready for just say 'Eff You!' to this place. My health is suffering, I'm absolutely miserable and I hate my life. Oh joy is me.
And since even thinking about my job stresses me out, that's all she wrote.
My Pets
Last 5 Books I've Read
1) Anne of Green Gables by Lucy Maud Montgomery
Well I just finished reading Anne for like the gazillionth time. I love this series, I really have lost count of the number of times I've read the books. I can really relate to Anne, she's a dreamer and has a huge imagination.
2) Ten Ways to Be Adored When Landing a Lord by Sarah MacLean
Cheesy historical romance novels are sort of my thing. I love getting lost in a cheesy, happily ever after story. What can I say I love romance? This particular novel was the second in a series fallowing...
3) Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake by Sarah MacLean
Once again just a wonderful cheesy romance novel.
4) Ten Things I Love About You by Julia Quinn
I love, love, love Julia Quinn. If you like historical romances you must check her out. She has a wonderful series about the Bridgerton family. I love the series that have intertwined characters like that. Each book stands alone as an individual story, but the characters that you have come to love will make appearances in some of the other stories.
5) A Lady's Guide to Improper Behavior by Suzanne Enoch
Yet another one of my cheesy romance novels. I love the 'Beauty and the Beast' spin that Enoch has in this story. A war hero that has been slandered and made to sound as though he did wrong. Only with the love and support of a very proper English miss can he clear his name.
iPod on Shuffle, First 10 Songs
1) I Want It All ~ Queen
Queen is sort of the soundtrack of the summer show season. My trainer and I both love Queen so we will always listen to it in the truck on the way to and from shows.
2) In My Pocket ~ Mandy Moore
Love this dance song. Matt and I always would have to hit the dance floor at Pegasus when it would come on.
3) Cell Block Tango ~ Chicago Soundtrack
Love, love, love musicals. This is from the movie version of the show and I adored Renee Zelwiger and Catherine Zeta-Jones in it. And this song is great.
4) Leaves and Kings ~ Josh Ritter
I was introduced to Josh Ritter by a friends parents a couple of years ago. I first saw him live in Toronto and he was amazing. Great folk music, and his concerts are great. He mostly plays small clubs and things like that, so it's a great, intimate setting. He really interacts with the audience.
5) All I Ask of You ~ Phantom of the Opera Soundtrack
This is absolutely my favorite musical of all time. I love the story, I love the music, I love everything about this show. I've seen it like 5 times and I will happily see it another 5 times.
6) I'm Still A Guy ~ Brad Paisley
Yeah, I'm a regular old farm girl, I love country music. And I love Brad Paisley, not only can he sing, but he's totally hot as well. Love this song, I just think it's so cute, and really true too. We're always asking guys to hold our purses and things like that.
7) To Sir With Love ~ Glee Cast
Oh course I'm a huge Glee fan, I'm a broadway nerd it's only natural. I loved this song, and in the episode I was crying as the kids sang it to Mr. Shue.
8) Cigarette Song ~ The Clarks
The Clarks are a local Pittsburgh band that's been around for as long as I've been alive. They have great sound and it doesn't hurt that the lead singer is gorgeous. Cigarette is one of their best known songs and it's got a great line in it about the Fayette County Fair. They have always remained true to their roots.
9) Toxic ~ Britney Spears
Yes, I'm a huge Brit Brit fan. What can I say, she's great. I know, I know she's made some horrible choices in her personal life but she's got great music. There's nothing better to get ready to go clubbing that bopping around to Britney. And when Glee did it's Britney episode it was the best thing for me!
10) Whiskey in the Jar ~ Seamus Kennedy
My Uncle Ralph introduced me to Seamus Kennedy a couple of years ago. He took me to see him play at Kelly's by the Riverside. Seamus is an Irish folk singer who does a great show. He's entertaining and really gets the crowd going with his music. When my aunt and uncle went to Ireland several years ago, the tour was arranged with Seamus. And every night they went to a local pub and Seamus would sing. They both had a great time and I wish I had the money to go on one of his tours.
Something I've Learned
Well, I've learned a lot of things.
I've learned that nothing cures what ails you like being on the back of a horse.
I've learned that sometimes your mother really does not what's best for you.
I've learned that no matter what you can always call your best friend, regardless of the time of day or night.
I've learned that there really is nothing better than flying around a cross country course on the back of a thoroughbred.
I've learned that while mares can be absolute bitches they can also be a mother to their riders.
I've learned that you don't have to ride in clinics or take daily lessons to learn.
I've learned that just because someone is a good rider does not automatically mean they are a good teacher.
I've learned that oxiclean is a riders friend.
I've learned that you can never have too much tack. You never know when that extra bridle is going to come in handy.
I've learned that the bond between a girl and her horse is stronger than anything else.
I've learned that just walking around the ring can be enjoyable, especially when you are walking on a horse that should have died a year ago.
I've learned that no matter what, I wouldn't give up my pony for anything.
Favorite Vacation
My favorite vacation is one I am lucky enough to go on every year in April. Every year at the end of April we head on the annual pilgrimage to Kentucky for the Rolex Kentucky 3 Day Event. Really did you expect my favorite vacation to not include horses? This past year was an even better time as we had the opportunity to see the Kentucky Cup Dressage and Show Jumping events in addition to the 3 Day.
How could you not love a weekend where you can see top horse and rider combinations performing one tempi changes, pirouettes, other Grand Prix dressage movements, see horse tackling some of the most difficult cross country questions, and them finish off the weekend with some awe-inspiring stadium jumping. It truly was an amazing weekend. And I can't wait to go back in 2011. And who knows maybe someday, I'll be riding there...
Favorite City
Something I'm Grateful For
I've touched on this in the past, specifically on my annual Thanksgiving post. But because I think it never hurts to acknowledge this again, I'm going to reiterate here.
Most importantly, I am so grateful for my wonderful family. Without them I would be nothing. They support me, they are there for me no matter what. I couldn't do anything without their love and support behind me. I am eternally grateful for all that they do for me.
I am grateful that I have such a wonderful best friend. Blair truly is a sister to me. She has always been there to comfort me, let me vent or go get drunk, whatever the occasion called for! And even though she is now living so very far away, we are still just as close as we ever were.
I am grateful for my ponies. They each give me so much and help me in different ways. No matter what is going on in my life I can always go in with X and hug his neck and I instantly feel better. Kaye has taught me so much over the years. She's been there to give me confidence when I needed it, and she's made me a better rider. And Miss, she took care of me when I was just starting to event, now it's my turn to take care of her.
Nicknames
Well there are the two obvious nicknames Jen and Jenna. For the longest time I went by Jen. But then in high school my best friend was also named Jenn and so I started going by Jenna. Much less confusing that way. Then when I went away to college, one of my friends tried to start calling my Jenny. Which I hate the name Jenny, too many bad associations with people from high school. So then it turned into JennyPenny, which was cool. Because Penny was the kick ass girl from Inspector Gadget. Eventually that got shortened to JaiPai. And now Blair a lot of times just calls me J.
Of course there are the other nicknames that are not derivatives of my name. XtraPony is one of them, thanks to this blog. I had a co-worker once who called me Princess. Perfectly fitting of course! After all that's what I am. And then there are the embarrassing nicknames from my childhood. At one point I told everyone who would listen that my name was Garfield. Hey I was like 5 at the time what can I say?
Something I Miss
I miss having Blair in the same state! LOL. No really I do miss having my best friend close by. Yeah, we talk on the phone all the time, but really it's not the same as being able to talk face to face. I can't just call her up to go to the store, or the bar, or just to hang out.
Following on yesterday's post, I miss Bum Bev and Pap Bill. It's been almost 14 years since we lost Bum Bev and just over 2 since Pap. And I still miss them everyday. Sometimes it's the stupidest things that will make me think about them and get all teary eyed. When Jeffrey got married in September he asked me to light a memory candle for Bum and Pap. That really meant a lot to me to be included in that way and also that he was including them in the ceremony.
Lastly, just a few months ago, my (long term) relationship ended rather unexpectedly. With no warning to me, nothing really. He just stopped returning my calls, answering my texts, everything. I don't know why, I wasn't given any kind of an explanation. Just suddenly all communication ceased. I'm not going to lie, not here at least, that really hurt. Was it something I did or said? Or something I didn't do? I don't know. And I really miss him. He was part of my life for so long, he was there for so much. Talking to him and knowing that I had his support was one of the things that helped me get through my grandfather's passing. I miss that. I miss him, I miss talking to him and I just miss know that I had someone there for me.
Ok and we have another depressing post. But in happier news Blair came home yesterday! She'll be home for a week and then next Monday I'm driving back to Georgia with her and I stay till the 2nd! WOOT! We'll be in the same state(s) for two whole weeks!
Something I Regret
The biggest thing that I regret would be not spending more time with my grandparents when I had the chance. Not to say that I didn't spend a lot of time with them, but I still wish I had more. And I really regret that I was more interested in going to a horse show on the first day Pap was at Good Samaritan. Because of that I missed my chance to see him when he was still aware and able to talk to us. I did spend as much time there as I could in his last few weeks. And even though it was really hard for me to see him like that, I'm glad that I did. Even if Pap wasn't aware of what was going on, I'm glad that he was surrounded by family when he did pass on. Mom, Dad, Aunt Sandy, Uncle Ralph and I were all in the room with him. I was sitting in the chair by his bed, and was holding his hand. He knew that he was loved by us all until the very end. I just wish that I could have had more time. I wish Bum Bev had been here to see me graduate, both high school and college. I wish they both could be here to see me get married (whenever that might be).
Alright this is super depressing and making my cry. So I think it's time to say goodnight.
Something I'm Looking Forward To
Well, there are a couple of things that I'm looking forward to. More immediately I'm looking forward to Blair coming home for Christmas and then our road trip to Georgia. I don't get to see B nearly as much as I would like to now that she's living so far away. So I have to make the most of our time together. And that's definitely going to happen this year. After Christmas I'm going to drive back to Macon with her and spend a few days there. We'll finally get to do that road trip that we've been wanting for so long. And then I'll get to spend some time with Blair and have her undivided attention. Yay!
And then a little further off, I'm looking forward to show season starting in the spring. I can't wait to get out there in from of the judge again. Whether it's in the dressage ring with Kaye, decked out in my sparkliest with Dalal or showing off Bugsy in Liberty, I just can't wait to show again. It really is the highlight of my year when I get to show off the hard work I've put in.
My Dream House
Hmmm, my dream house. Well first of all, my dream house is actually a dream farm. Come on, you can't tell me you didn't see that coming. And I've put a lot more thought into the barn than I have the house. I don't want a huge barn, maybe 10 stalls max. The stalls would all be 14 x 14 and have heated, automatic waterers and trap doors to hay from the loft. There would be a heated tack room with a small kitchenette. I would have a wash stall with hot water. And there would be a laundry room, no need to drag blankets and saddle pads to the house. Attached to the barn would be a large 100 x 200 indoor arena. There would also be an outdoor dressage ring and another large outdoor arena for jumping.
I would like to have enough acreage to several pastures for turnout and room for cross country schooling at various levels. Ideally I would like to be able to grow my own hay on the property as well. So lets throw in some hay fields.
Now for the house. I would like it be far enough from the barn that I don't have horses looking directly in my front window, but still close enough that I can easily walk to the barn when I need to. An attached garage is a must. And a mud room/laundry room between the garage and the rest of the house. So I can strip off the barn clothes and toss them right in the laundry. A big eat in kitchen, must be bright, with lots of natural sunlight. I'd like to have the formal dinning room to use for when company is over as well. And then the majority of the first floor would be taken up by the great room. Just a place for friends and family to get together and hang out, watch the game or whatever. Also on the first floor would be the office/library. Of course my massive book collection has to have a home somewhere. Upstairs there would be a large master suite. I'd like it to be big enough to have the bedroom area plus a sitting area. Someplace I could have a comfy chair to curl up in with a book. The attached bathroom should have both a shower and a jacuzzi tub, as well as his and her sinks and plenty of storage. And of course there needs to be a walk in closet. Also upstairs would be two or three other bedrooms and a separate bathroom.
Yeah I know I'm not asking for much here. :) Now to find a really rich husband to buy this for me.
Favorite Quotes
Well originally the prompt was for your favorite bible verse, but as I mentioned a few days ago, I'm not terribly religious, so I wouldn't be able to quote you a bible verse at all, let alone name a favorite. So we're going to discuss favorite quotes instead.
Along with death...hope and rebirth begin.
I can't actually remember were I heard this one, it's been that long. But it's always stuck with me. A reminder that even though it doesn't seem like it at the time, good things will eventually come from the bad. The whole circle of life thing. But thinking of this quote has gotten me through some tough times.Don't dream it, be it!
Ahh, good old Dr. Frank-N-Furter from Rocky Horror. Although the movie was incredibly campy, this quote is a good reminder to always go for your dreams. Regardless of how out of reach they seem, we are nothing if we don't dream big. And you never know if you could achieve those dreams unless you try.If we backed off on everything because of words that Republicans found silly, we'd have a lot of pregnant teenagers and no healthcare.
And now a TV quote, this is from Donna Moss on The West Wing. Don't let anyone talk you out of your convictions. It doesn't matter if someone else thinks it's silly, if it's important to you then you should stand by it. Don't listen to the naysayers, listen to your heart and what you think is right.Read more...
A Picture I Love
Well I can't exactly narrow it down to one picture that I love, so I'll be posting a couple here.
My Goals
Yay! Goal setting! Bonnie has really instilled in my the importance of setting goals. And as you can see from post over the past year, I have tried to keep up with my goals this year. Some successfully, some not so much. So...
Horse/Riding Goals
What I Believe
Well, this is kind of a hard one for me. I'm not a particularly religious person. Yes I do believe in a higher power, but I haven't been to church in eons. And I'm not sure that I necessarily believe in a God as described by any particular religion. How can a God allow such suffering to go on in the world? How can God allow small children to be beaten and molested? How can God allow wars and killing to go on for so long? I don't know I would think that God would not want his children to be put through so much suffering. Yes there is some kind of a higher power at work, but my thoughts differ wildly from the church I was brought up in.
So what do I believe in?
I believe that there is no better remedy for what ails you than the back of a horse. I have yet to find anything that comforts me better than hoping on the back of my pony.
I believe that nothing soaks up tears better than my pony's mane.
I believe that there is no better feeling in the world than flying over a cross country course with my mare.
I believe that a well ridden dressage test is a thing of beauty.
I believe that the thoroughbred is the epitome of grace, beauty and power.
Amazing that all my beliefs seem to be related to the horse. Shocking I know.
Something I Am Afraid Of
Well there are a couple of things. And not tangible objects, like spiders or snakes (although I'm not really a fan of either of those) The big thing I'm afraid of is failure. I don't want to live my life and not accomplish anything. And right now I'm feeling dangerously close to that. When I'm old and on my deathbed, I want to be able to look back on my life and feel as though I've made a difference somewhere, for someone. Right now, I haven't. This also translates into everyday stuff. When I start something I want to be able to finish it. Once of the reasons that I sometimes get so frustrated with my lack of progress in my riding. I feel as though I'm failing by not moving forward.
Somewhat fitting in with that is my second fear. Which is being alone. Not that I mean I can't ever be by myself, but I'm afraid that I won't ever find that "one". That I won't have someone to share my life with. And let's be honest here. I'm not getting any younger. I'm going to be 29 (shudder) in less than two months. I'm sort of running out of time if I want to get married and have kids. I don't want to be one of those women having kids at 40 and not being able to keep up with them. Actually right now, I'd have to say this is my biggest fear. And I guess it's just been really highlighted lately as a lot of my (younger) friends have been getting married. Including some that I never thought would get married.
Alright enough of that depressing stuff.
